Desamor
In the darkness, I have always found a solace through writing.
Even during the worst nights of my life, I was able to heal through my writing.
This post is for the girl who needs to heal from a broken heart.
I’ve learned a lot of things during this past week alone:
Positivity begets positivity & sometimes, even when we think everything is going right, sometimes the world smacks us in the face when we’re not looking.
Personally, two monumental things happened this week: I managed to get a job during a global pandemic and…
The person I really saw myself with ended our relationship.
My mother always told me that when one door closes another one opens. Who would have thought that it would literally happen in the span of 48 hours?
I saw shooting stars in your eyes when I looked at you but I never saw deeper than the stars.
I whispered mindless nothings into your ear without allowing you to whisper them back to me.
To say I loved is an understatement, I felt. I felt a world of hope when I was in your arms.
I dreamed of you through all my shades of blue.
Yet, with all these images of joy, I never noticed that you might not have been living in the same world that I had built.
I want to say this is a post about me pitying the what might’ve been between us, but instead, I choose to see the beauty in this world.
You will always be a part of my heart that helped me find my motivation and I will always look back on us with fond memories but while you are my someone great, you are not the air that I inhale.
There’s a wonderful song from my favorite show “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend” called “Without Love You Can Save The World” … It is a song that my friends and I play when we’re trying to have a good time, I think the message stays with me.
When a relationship ends, we have to remember that it’s not an ending. It’s the beginning of a new chapter of your life. Even though it seems like my heart is going to cut in half and that the sky is going to fall, I know that there are positives and silver linings surrounding this.
I know that even though I want to cry and watch Bridget Jones, I have things to do.
This is the time to get my sh*t together.
This is the time to immerse myself in all the projects that I want to do.
It’s time to write all the plays, film all the monologues, and most importantly put myself into my art.
Sometimes our best creations come from our heartbreak.
The last time someone broke up with me I told myself that I’ll “take my broken heart and turn it into art.”
This is the time to do it.
I can’t lose hope because I can survive on my own. I’ve done it before and I can do it again.
It’s time to spend time with myself and time to pamper myself like a pretty princess.
You’re right my love, if you love something you have to let it go.
It’s not the end of us. It’s the beginning of us growing. Even if we’re not growing together, we’re still growing to be the best versions of ourselves.
It won’t get better in a day.
Thoughts of you will pass my mind and while I might shed a tear or miss your warm embrace, I know that this might be what is best for us.
And who knows? Maybe one day our hearts will intertwine once more and we can comeback to the home that we built together.
There is a life outside of relationships. It may not seem like it when you were dumped an hour ago but healing takes time.
Healing is not linear and it might take a week, month, or even a year to fully heal from what was lost.
However, when you find yourself in the darkness, put your hands in dirt and pull yourself out of the mud because at the end of the day, positivity begets positivity and I have to believe that this happened for a reason.
“He’s very dreamy, but he is not the sun”
The real sun will rise tomorrow and so will you.
