Ihr

Sometimes when I meditate, I see this image of me staring at me.

She is glowing with a bright yellow aura. She is not dressed glamorously but she carries herself like she is royalty. She has these eyes that have an attentive gaze over me as if she is ready to listen to my every word. Yet, out of her entire appearance, all I notice is her smile.

There is a warm vibrant smile that feels so genuine, so raw, so real that she seems almost foreign to me.

The meditation goes deeper.

Soon the words of my guided meditation flow out of her mouth like waves crashing against the sand. As she speaks, a sense of peace falls over the space. I feel safe. I feel happier. I wonder how she got from where I am sitting to who she is because all I can think about is wanting to be her.

I long so badly to be her.

The meditation ends.

My eyes are still shut closed with a padlock. I hold the keys to open them in my hand but I want to toss them into the bottom of the ocean. I do not want to leave her. She takes my hand.

“But darling, you are already halfway there. You won’t get there unless you open your eyes.”

Her smile, the sureness in her voice, it is enough for me to be ready to let go.

She gives me a hug.

I am ready to start my day.